Thoughts on turning 30

When I was little, I used to think people in their thirties were old. Especially my parents. However, I have distinct memories of Dad and Mom in their thirties doing things like lighting fireworks off between their legs (Dad) and teaching step aerobics classes (Mom). These aren’t things that old people do! I’m not planning on doing either of those any time soon, but I have been thinking a lot about what adventures the next decade will bring.

In four words I can sum up my twenties: college, jobs, husband, son. Short words that represent major milestones. I always felt like I was in a rush to check things off life’s to-do list. In the back of my mind I was always thinking, “Okay, what’s next?” All of the ups and downs, the people that have come in and out of my life, the quiet moments and the loud ones, have led me down a path to discovering who I am. And although we all have our good days and bad days, I’m pretty damn happy where I’ve landed. Yesterday I was 29.

Today I am 30. My intention is to slow down and do more of what I love with the people I love. One of the benefits of being a stay at home mom is that I get to choreograph goofy dances and sing silly songs all the time. I get to discover the inner kid that was buried under years of “Okay, what’s next?” I want to cook delicious meals and take more time to chew my food. I want to see family and friends more often and focus less on the things and people that create negative energy. I want to take risks and try new things. Not because I think it will get me ahead or create some major change, but because it just feels good.

I don’t mean to sound sappy and everyone’s journey is a personal one. I just hope that maybe sharing how I feel about turning thirty might spark a nerve somewhere out there. That maybe we can all shift our focus just a little from where we think we should be to where we are right now. That a small change like that might cause a ripple in our hearts and open us up to finding a little more inner peace. Because that’s where peace lives! It’s not around the corner…it’s in all of us. Right here and right now.

Thank you for reading and have a beautiful day! I’ll be spending the day with this little man and loving every minute! (Well…except the minutes that he’s acting like a crazy toddler…) So I’ll be enjoying some of the day, haha!

cole mommy

Bye Bye, Binky

We had Cole’s two year check up today at Elliot Pediatrics in Londonderry. Sometimes I wonder whether I should change pediatricians, because there are a lot of practices that are closer to us. But then Dr. Hajduk’s awesomeness reels me right back in and makes me realize the extra ten minutes in the car is totally worth it.

When you have a baby who is born below the 1st percentile in weight, or if your child has any weight gain issues, you tend to be a bit of a numbers freak. Even after two years of happy and healthy check ups, I still get anxious when Cole is sitting on the scale. Thankfully, his numbers place him in the 35th percentile for both weight and height….not that I’m counting 🙂

The biggest news of the day? I took the pacifier away. I promised myself (and my husband) that when Cole turned two, the binky would bounce.

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It was time…

I won’t go through all the gory details, but he was reeeeally angry that he didn’t have that binky to help him fall asleep at naptime. He cried. He whipped himself over his crib railing and onto the floor (ouch). His lovey stuffed animal, Piglet, took a few punches for the cause, but he did fall asleep after about 20 minutes of fussing.  I felt so bad that I snuck into his room after he fell asleep, picked him up out of his crib, and rocked him for 20 minutes while he slept in my arms.

Thankfully, he still loved me when he woke up from his nap a couple of hours later. We’ll see how tonight goes. Bedtime is right about….NOW! Wish us luck and a binky-less night.

Happy wife, happy life?

Let’s face it. Sometimes we are so focused on our kids that we forget about the super cool couples that created these little humans. If you are like my husband and me, you might find yourselves on a Sunday afternoon sprawled out on the family room couches, feeling flat out tired, while your toddler naps. Our conversation went something like this –

Me: You okay?

Him: Yeah, I think so. You?

Me: Tired. And I feel kind of bummed out. When was the last time you did something for you that made you feel happy?

Him: I don’t even know.

Before we were parents it was a lot easier to go out on a whim and do something fun! We travelled, tried new places for dinner, and snuggled in on Saturday mornings. My husband could catch up with friends over a round of golf while I sweat it out in a yoga studio. The freedom made it a lot easier to connect, communicate, and resolve any issues that came up between us. Besides connecting with my husband, it was also a whole lot easier to connect with myself! Although I am happy with our decision for me to be a stay-at-home mom, there are a lot of things I miss about my old life as a working professional. I had great co-workers, an active social life, and felt proud of my accomplishments in the digital marketing industry.

Greg and me golfing in Arizona.

Greg and me golfing in Arizona.

Now that I’m a mom I’m realizing that the saying “Happy wife, happy life” has a whole lot of truth to it! And I don’t mean it’s up to my husband to keep me happy. Feeling good about myself gives me more energy to focus on my family, fulfill my responsibilities as a mom, and be more attentive and supportive to my husband. A friend of mine made a comment on her Facebook page that struck a chord with me and I want to share it with you. (Side note – follow Judy Hu Counseling Services on Facebook! Judy is an amazing mom, Psychotherapist and Parent Coach. She shares some great stuff on her page!)  She suggests, “The adjustment to a growing family can be easier if the priority is shared between self care, partner care, and child care…priority in that order.” It makes sense, doesn’t it? If I am happy, we are happy. A child will thrive in a home with a strong foundation built on happy, loving parents.

Having my son has been the best thing I’ve ever done in my life. He has altered the way I look at myself, my husband, and the world around me. He will be two years old next week and I’m turning 30 a couple of weeks after that! I’ve been on quite a personal journey over the past couple of years, and I’m just now realizing that it’s possible to find a balance between who I used to be and who I am now. With a little faith and a lot of hard work I can achieve both personal and professional success. One thing is for certain. Next time we ask each other, “When was the last time you did something for you that made you happy?” I want us both to have an answer. I think the world would be happier place if we all took the time to answer that question. If you love your family, love yourself!

My beautiful little family.

My beautiful little family.

Love, peace, and happiness to all!